Hell...

HELL EXPLAINED  BY A CHEMISTRY STUDENT

The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student.

The answer by this student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct..... ...leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

Lovely Day!

Well, after a crappy day of arguing about things I have no interest in, dealing with loud customers, bad waitresses, my lower back killing me and looking forward to two more 12 hour days this week. I am home alone with dinner and laundry. YES!

Busy Week

 Meeting in Charlotte this past Wednesday. Staff at work has had to go to some training out of the store, so I've been putting in some extra effort to make sure all goes smoothly. On top of that, it's 97 degrees outside and the air in the building seems to be having issues. Just another week.

Interesting Video

Google+

 So, not ONLY am I on Google+ now, but I see that there have been changes in Blogger as well. Interesting. I like the new look on the back end. Google + is also interesting. I like how easy it is to share with just a few people or everyone at once. I also like how pictures and video work. Looking forward to using it more and more.

Waiting

Thursday and another day at work. Have to work this coming Sunday for a bit as we're having a crew to come in and do some work on the building. Fine with that as that means I'll have two days off during the week next week. Thinking of going up to Damascus and spending the day up there. Just me and a bike for the day. It being a weekday, there shouldn't be as many people on the trail either. Just feel the need to get out of town for a bit.

Kyoto

Another Holiday

Whoopie. Another holiday, another day of hell at work tomorrow. So, here I sit, reading at home by myself. Had a good day on Sunday with going to the Buddhist center in Raleigh and cooking out at Kim's house. The smoke got to my eyes a bit, but it was a nice time.
Honestly, I wish we'd been open today. That way the mindless consumers wouldn't be rushing in tomorrow making Tuesday twice the hell Monday usually is.
Looking forward to next weekend. May go out of town on Saturday for a bit. Thinking of heading up to Boone for the day.